Marriage & Wedding Planning

Congratulations to both of you!

Your engagement is a special time for each of you, for your families and friends, and for your entire parish community. This is a time of new beginnings, of love, of promise, and of hope. The Church is blessed and encouraged by your willingness to make this commitment of life and love to each other. Your wedding celebration will be a special and grace-filled time in your lives. The Church welcomes you to celebrate and solemnize your wedding in the context of Christian prayer.

May God bless you during this special time of reflection and preparation,
-The Pastoral Staff of St. Joseph Parish


Scheduling the Wedding

You are expected to contact Ken Stanczyk ten (10) months before the time you wish to marry. If you or your parents are not registered at St. Joseph Parish, and if you are not registered at any other parish, you must register in the parish first before a wedding date can be finalized. Once you are registered, the Parish Office can provide you with information regarding the availability of wedding dates at St. Joseph and give you a Wedding Information Packet. In the Wedding Information Packet you will find a “Pre-Nuptial Information” sheet. Fill this form out and return it to the Parish Office along with your deposit of $200.00 to reserve your wedding date on the parish calendar. This is an administrative fee that helps to defray the costs to the parish of preparing for and celebrating your wedding. We strongly suggest that you contact the Parish Office prior to arranging a date with a reception hall or caterer.

After the Parish Office receives the Pre-Nuptial Information sheet and $200 deposit, one of the Pastoral Staff will contact you to arrange the first meeting with you as a couple to begin the marriage preparation process. Weddings are usually scheduled for Saturdays with the latest time at 1:30 pm. Other days and times are possible, depending on the parish and presiding priest’s or deacon’s schedule. There are times in the church liturgical year, such as Lent and Advent, when the celebration of weddings is less appropriate. No weddings will be scheduled during Lent. Advent weddings will be scheduled only in special circumstances.

Contact: Ken Stanczyk – Director of Adult Ministry – 262-375-6500, x104 / kstanczyk@stjosephgrafton.org

Preparation for the Wedding Liturgy

A Pastoral Staff member, will provide you with a booklet that explains the various parts of the wedding liturgy. After your initial discussion, you will need to contact the parish Director of Music and Liturgy to arrange a time to discuss the details of your wedding liturgy.
The following are some helpful questions/answers to get you started:

Randy Hilgers-Director of Liturgy & Music – 262-375-6500, ext 106 / rhilgers@stjosephgrafton.org

1) Should our wedding happen outside of Mass or within Mass?

Some people seem to think that a couple is not really married unless the wedding takes place within a Mass. This is not true. Early in your marriage preparation it will be determined if the marriage should be celebrated outside of Mass (designated a marriage ceremony) or within Mass (designated a nuptial Mass).
It is important first to understand the difference between the two. Every nuptial Mass consists of three parts:
– the Liturgy of the Word, – the Marriage Rite, – and the Liturgy of the Eucharist (including the reception of communion).
The marriage ceremony consists of two parts:
– the Liturgy of the Word, – and the Marriage Rite.
*The Liturgy of the Eucharist with reception of communion is not part of a marriage ceremony.

If your marriage is celebrated within a marriage ceremony, one of the parish deacons may be the officiating clergy, or otherwise known as the presider. Your desires in this matter should center around what form of liturgy will best enable the particular wedding assembly to celebrate with the both of you.
Consider the following:

Both Catholic
Attend Mass Regularly
Your Guests

2) What planning for the wedding liturgy do we need to do
In your discussions with the member of the Pastoral Staff, you will be provided with a marriage planning book to assist you. You will use this book to help plan your marriage liturgy. In it you will find options for the exchange of marriage promises (vows), the general intercessions, and the scripture readings appropriate for use at weddings.

Readings
General Intercessions
Unity Candle
Decorations

3) Who are the ministers for the celebration?

You, the couple:
Presider:
Music Ministers:
Members of your family and friends should become involved:

Rehearsal / Wedding Day questions and answers

When is the wedding rehearsal?
What is needed at the wedding rehearsal?
Are photography and videotaping of the wedding allowed?
Is there a bride’s room available?
Should we have a receiving line at church?
May our guests throw rice, birdseed, confetti, etc.?
May the wedding party consume alcohol at church?
What address for the church should we include on our invitations?

Other Guidelines

RESPECT FOR SACRED SPACE
FEES / OFFERING TO THE PARISH
AFTER YOUR WEDDING
CONCLUDING THOUGHTS